We have our highs, and we have our lows... yesterday's practice was my low. School is catching most of my attention this week and my responsibilities are very demanding. They pull me from all angles when all I want to do is lie on my mat or hide in the gym for a few hours. This is that one time a year, or few if you are like me, where everything falls apart. You suddenly become less organized, your notes are suddenly scribbled, your room is a mess. Rather than doing assignments the week before, you find yourself finishing them the hour before class starts. My drive at both at my jobs seems minimal, and I find it very hard to work at a faster tempo and manage to keep a smile on my face, even in a relaxing setting like the maternity wing I work in at the hospital.
Even though my efforts have been minimal, I still end up at the gym every day, and I end up at yoga every Wednesday. This is something I convince myself to do, because otherwise I will be upset with myself. Yesterday's practice seemed like a low point for me. I haven't eaten much this week... I've been so busy. I have not been taking care of myself in the way that I strive to every other day of the year.
Yesterday's practice was very calming, we stayed close to our mats and focused on balance. It was not a physically demanding class, yet I felt pain in my shoulder from a nerve I could tell was not properly placed during my posture. That dull pain is not the same pain as you would experience from lifting weights, or even being punched in the arm. The pain is absolutely internal until the nerve reaches an area where it is no longer hurting. I stopped, would wait for the pain to quit, and try again. I had problems finding my breath and my ribs felt extremely tight.
Stress has my body feeling very worn down lately. But there is a happiness and a sanctification knowing I made it to my mat this week, and although after I had a horrible workout- I still had one.
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